Hi
Im 14 years old and engaged to the love of my life. I've known him since I was four years old and fell in love with him then. He's 18. We've decided to get married when I'm 21. Is that to young? I honestly don't feel like waiting that long. My friend just turned 15 and is engaged, and her and her fiancee are getting married in January of 2008. I know she will be too young for that, but will I be? And what about our age difference? Is that a problem too??
Despite some very few circumstances, only those who are your age or a few years older (17, 18, 19) etc will advise you to "just go for it". This is because they, as yourself, are SOOOOOOOOO young. I'm sorry, you do not know who you are or what is right for your life at that age. In fact, it is not until mid 20's, in my opinion, that you truly know. Wait. It's not worth it. And, please do not listen to anyone who is telling you to "go for it" who still has "teen" in their age. As much as they mean well, they do not have the knowledge or experience to give advice. Good luck and please, be smart.
Who do I think I am, Megan? I'm 26 and you're 17-HUGE difference here. Your comments alone prove your immaturity. A whole year, huh? Wow! That's almost a lifetime! Granted at your age, that seems like a substantial amount of time to be together, but compared to a whole married life, that is nothing. And, Megan, no one is saying that you don't love him, so quit with the defensiveness. As I said before, my comments are not being made to criticize anyone, solely to give my opinion. And, excuse ME, Megan, but I didn't realize that having a child and getting married before you are even a legal adult, let alone a mature person, is "living in this century". And, please, before you teach your child anything, grow up and learn how to argue in a mature manner without throwing out the rude comments-it just makes you look even more childish.
Hi Megan,
Thanks for the message back-this, on the other hand, proved you do have the maturity. I believe that all situations are different. It sounds that you have had to raise yourself, in many ways and because of that have grown up in a faster pace than most your age. I will never pretend that I understand what you went through or what brought you to the situation you are in now. I think that you raising your brothers and sisters is a very honorable thing, be it unfair to you at your age. With that being said, the young lady who originated this post may not have the experiences that you have that enabled you to deal with situations that came about and in most cases (yours may be different), children that age do not know what is best for them. I think it's great that your boyfriend/fiance is going to college and that you both desire to get married in a church and do it for real! I wish you all the luck! I appreciate the apology and I hope that you understand that I was not judging you, I was making a generalized opinion, of which I still hold, but that obviously differs by situation. Take care, Megan!
Its good to find the love of your life so young. I wish i could of, yes 21 would be good that will give you years to think if you still want to do it! but dont do something if you feel ablogated to do it!
No sweetie,i was engagemenet when i was 16 and my fiancee was 21... Soooo its okay to be engagement when u want to be, u dont have to listen to people who said u too young, i mean its ur life u do what u want.. And be happy who u be with, its ur chocie..
This makes me very, very sad. If I'm correct, you must be... What.. 15 now? Are you still in love with this guy?
I will say this now without a doubt that no 14, 15 year old in this day and age is mature enough, socially, mentally, academically..etc etc... To even suggest getting married.
I have worked and lived with A LOT of 14, 15 year olds, of all different backgrounds and none of them, as mature and well travelled as they may be, are definitely not old enough to commit themselves to a relationship that is vowed for life.
What I will say though, is that it is worth committing yourself to a relationship with this guy. There is nothing more inspiring than seeing a girl grow into a beautiful young woman and still working on a relationship from her teen years. Keep things together. Thats something that even adults can't do. If he truly loves you, he will wait.
And please, don't get married for the sex. Sex is beautiful, but its not worth making an expensive commitment.
Don't give into the peer pressure that you must date because you are young. I never dated until I graduated high school and even then it did not appeal to me.
I can honestly say that, all the things that I have done in my life up til this point would've been infinitely better if my fiancee had been there to experience them with me. If you know in your heart that you could spend the rest of your life with this guy through EVERYTHING, then commit to him and do whatever necessary to make things work.
You're only young sweetie. Live a little, don't rush and don't compromise your beliefs.
I'm 20 and and getting married next year. We are both ready for this but it took us awhile. You are only 14 and you have so many more years to go before you should even consider marriage. If your love is true then you should be able to wait it out. Just make sure you're ready before you make a life altering decsion.
Yes you are too young to get married. You'll probably get divorced in notime and seriously I totally don't understand how your parents could let you get engaged this early either.
Good things come to those who wait. If it is meant to be it will happen when it should. Being married is a serious responsibility and at 14 you have so much to still experience. The age difference will level out over time, but right now, it IS A BIG DEAL. You cant vote...you cant rent a car....you cant even legally enter contracts yet....you cant drink legally....you cant go to the casino (I am in CT and we have them here).....there is so much left to experience and you might end up wondering for the REST OF YOUR LIFE what you missed out on. If you have loved each other this long, then you will still love each other when you are legal. And, no offense, but guys at his age aren't the most responsible either. Have you given thought to where you will live, who will work, and if it is enough to live on. Do you have a job? Really think a lot about this. You must be just to post here. Divorce rates are through the roof, so plan carefully for the REST OF YOUR LIFE. Hope for the best but plan for the worst.
Hi honey--I'm a mom of 3 girls, 25, 24 and 20. The oldest is married since last Oct and the next oldest this Sept. It isn't a question of are you to young, rather have you lived long enough and experienced who you are as you grow from teen to 20's that matters when making this very big decision. All of my girls were with the love of their life at your age--and they were, however, the same person who fits at 14 is not the same love that works for you at 21, 25 or any age. We all change over time and your now love may be perfect for who you are at 14 but we don't know who you will be at 21 - after you have been through 7 more years and learned 7 more years about yourself, the world and relationships. If your now love is your forever love, that won't change even as you both grow over the next 7 years. Also, it is generally a good thing to realize that if you are asking the question, you are not sure. Love your love now and let things happen as they happen. Keep in mind that, like clothing choices, what fits and is appropriate at 14 is not the same style that you will where when you're 21. It is good to ask questions and it is good to let yourself find the answers -- be sure to take the time to be sure. Much happiness and love, Marm (that's what all the kids call me)
Although I don't think 21 is too young to get married, 14 is too young to be engaged. I'm 19 and my boyfriend is 20. We've been together two years and we want to get married in about two years (I'd like to be atleast 21). You will grow and mature so much from 14 to 21, your views might be totally different from what they are now. At this point in your life you should really be just enjoying yourself with friends, and focusing on school, not be engaged! Seven years is a LONG time, but if you two are set on it, good luck. Before you get married you should be financially stable, enough to be able to have your own place and live comfortably. Don't give up your education for anyone or have an unplanned pregnancy! This is your life and you only have one, so be smart!
Where are your parents? You are too young to be thinking about getting married - definately too young to be engaged. If you reach 21, are still together and are sure you are right for each other, THEN get engaged.
You won't believe how much you're going to change before you're 21. Although you may be in love now, you may grow apart in a few years. Enjoy being a teenager now instead of trying to be an adult so quickly.
Listen, I was there. I was 14 when I thought I had met the love of my life. We got "engaged" when i was 14.5. He was 17 and a jr. If high school while I was a freshman so we were 2 years apart. Even though I did not realize it at the time he was abusive and controling. Long story short I left him my jr. Year and it was the best decision of my life. I went on in school. Got better grades. Made more freinds and enjoyed life alot more. I met my fiance two years ago while working with him. We are young we are both 19. But we are waiting til we are 21 to get married for two reasons, maturity and money. LOOK DONT SELL YOURSELF SHORT. YOU MAY NOT SEE IT NOW BUT YOU COULD BE SO MUCH MORE. LEARN FROM OTHER PEOPLES MISTAKES. {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{STAY A KID AS LONG AS POSSIBLE, ITS WORTH IT}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
