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Freaky Family Reunion |
It was a weekend to remember. A family reunion to the tenth degree. Uncles, aunts, cousins, grandparents, and everybody else in between flocked to Martha's Vineyard to hug, eat, play, and take a gazillion pictures. It all started as a simple idea my Mom and Dad had when their 25th wedding anniversary was about to roll around. Instead of local celebration, they decided to get the entire family all together--something that hadn't happened since their wedding a quarter of a century before.
First thing up was sitting down to do a little family reunion planning. It's one thing to know who all your relatives are, it's another thing to put together a data base of addresses and phone numbers to make sure everyone would be invited. And finding a common date was not easy, but Mom and Dad just decided to pick something far enough away that everyone who wanted to come could adjust their schedules accordingly. July 4th became that date which gave the entire brood six monthes to work out the details.
And details there was... airlines availability, living accommodations, caterers, fun and games, and everything else that goes with a family reunion right down to matching t-shirts for the big group photo. Once all the preliminary stuff was rolling along, it was time to call or write extended family members and make contact--contact that had not happened for many, many years.
I have to digress here because it was at this time I learned just how many cousins I actually had and how FREAKY some of them actually were. Our calls and e-mails asked for relatives to respond to the family reunion idea and to send current pictures of themselves. We couldn't believe some of the polaroids that were sent to us. Wild. Crazy. Freaky.
My cousins from L.A., Cindy and Dave, I like to call the Glam Rockers. Dave was dressed in tight, leather pants and a sleeveless T-shirt. I think he had on more make-up than Cindy, but it was at least a tie. Now Cindy had spiked-out pink hair, kind of porcupine-like, with a mesh outfit--head to toe. She kind of looked like she wrapped herself in a spool of medical gauze. They both wore big, black boots, but his clearly had the higher heels. It also looked like they shared lipstick and eyeliner.
Now my cousin from New York was totally Goth. If you don't know what Goth is, just imagine one of those street mimes--all in black with white make-up--except that my cousin didn't have a clue what "Man Stuck In A Box" was all about. To me, she looked like she was ready for a Halloween Party instead of a Family Reunion. I really couldn't make sense of her black hair with red streaks except it did match her red and white horizontally-striped leggings (maybe this was part of her soccer gear?). I really got a kick out of her matching boots and cape. It kinda of had this Dracula feel to it minus the blood-sucking (at least I hope it's minus the bloodsucking).
When the pictures of my cousins from Iowa rolled in, I was in total culture shock. I couldn't figure out how three blond haired, blue-eyed kids who lived on a dairy farm could look like Eminem and his posse. I'm talking ten-times too big NBA uniform tops over equally huge T-shirts, and enough Bling-Bling to choke a cow (that was a diary farm reference). How does a kid who raises cows in the middle of corn country suddenly have a head full of cornrows? I don't get it. And I really don't get how he wears his over-sized pants down to his butt, but still can walk around without tripping over his bulging pants legs. I really got a kick out of how he changed his name from Edward Earl to Easy E.
The next set of pictures really blew me away. My twin cousins from San Fransicso were total opposites. I guess that Stevie and Mickey had been dressed alive for so long they just rebelled the first chance they go. Stevie has become the total biker dude. He's got the Fonzie leather jacket, bandanna-covered shaved head, and a tattoo on his that says he loves either his mother or Mondays--I couldn't tell because his pet bull dog, Butch, was in the way. Now Mickey on the other hand went totally Ultra Mod. Instead of a Harley, he drives a scooter and he traded in his blue jeans for black, tapered dacron-polyester with shiny vinyl boots to match. His hair is really different with kind of a Beatles/throwback mop top look. Now that I think of it, he kind of reminds my of Ringo minus the rings and drumming ability. I kind of hope they each bring their vehicles so I can see them have a street race.
All in all, I'll have about twenty cousins at the family reunion which means twenty wild and crazy characters to get to know. Of course, they're all probably looking at my picture and wondering, "Who is this geek?" However things turn out, it's going to be good to see how the other side of my family lives and maybe I'll learn how to steak my hair or the proper way to pierce my navel. Well, gotta go. As my rapper cousing might say, I have to get my "lick on" so I can get all these invitations out asap. Here's to a Freaky Family Reunion.
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